Wednesday, September 30, 2015

30 Days of Kink - Day 30


Whatever BDSM/kink related thing you want to write about.

Nah. This meme was pretty thorough and I can't think of anything else to say. But what I will do is open the door to My readers. Is there anything you'd like to know about Me that hasn't already been covered either by this meme, My About Me page or My FAQ? Leave your question in the comments.

Tuesday, September 29, 2015

30 Days of Kink - Day 29


Do you have a BDSM title (e.g. mistress, princess, goddess, ma’am, etc.)? What is your opinion of the use of titles in general?

I prefer to be addressed as "Miss K" but I also accept "Goddess" or "Princess." I only accept "Mistress" from slaves who wear My collar.

As far as the use of titles in general is concerned, I have no opinion. If people want to use them, great. If not, that's cool too. What titles individual people choose to use is none of My business.

Monday, September 28, 2015

30 Days of Kink - Day 28


How do you dress for kink/BDSM play? What significance does your attire have to you?

I dress however I want. I'm particularly fond of corsets and heels, but I could rock jeans and a t-shirt if I felt like it. I own clothing in styles that run the gamut from romantic Goth to cyberpunk to corporate executive. It depends on My mood and the atmosphere I'm trying to create. The most important factor is whether or not I can move comfortably enough to do what I want to do.

Sunday, September 27, 2015

30 Days of Kink - Day 27


Do your non-kink interests ever find their way into your kinky activities? If so, how?

Of course! My geeky tendencies find their way into My kink life in the form of erotic role-play scenarios. These often involve transformation of some type, from sissy training to turning My sub into a rubber doll.

Saturday, September 26, 2015

30 Days of Kink - Day 26


What’s your opinion on online BDSM play?

I love it. I'm at a point in My life where I'm far too busy to maintain a real life kink relationship. I have too many responsibilities and goals I'm trying to achieve to devote Myself to a D/s relationship. Online play allows Me to be mobile and still get My kink on.

Friday, September 25, 2015

30 Days of Kink - Day 25


How open are you about your kinks?

I don't go around introducing Myself as dominatrix to people I meet on the street, but I'm not hiding either. Obviously, since I write this blog and engage with people on other social media. If someone asks, I have no issue speaking about Myself, but I see no reason to volunteer information.

Thursday, September 24, 2015

30 Days of Kink - Day 24


What qualities do you look for in a partner?

There are so many factors that go into finding a compatible partner that I hardly know where to begin. A few of the most important qualities are (in no particular order):
  • Intelligence
  • Honesty
  • Loyalty
  • Generosity/likes to spoil Me
  • Being considerate/putting My wants and needs before his own
  • A good sense of humor
  • Nerdy interests like sci-fi/fantasy 
  • Compatible kinks

Wednesday, September 23, 2015

30 Days of Kink - Day 23


Since you first developed an interest in kink, have your interests/perspectives changed? How so?

Of course they've changed. I've grown as a person, met new and interesting play partners, and been introduced to a much wider variety of activities than when I began My journey into kink at 19. I discovered there's so much more to BDSM than tying up a sub and fucking; there are as many ways to "do BDSM" as there are people. If you can imagine it, there are people somewhere out there doing it and having a hell of a time.

I've discovered I'm much more interested in dominance than I am in topping. I'm not particularly interested in quick "sessions" although there are plenty of people who want to know if I'm available for them. I find sessions boring, hollow, and unsatisfying. Don't get Me wrong; sessions are great for those who enjoy that style of play and I'm not dissing them at all, but they're not for Me. I want to get to know My subs and develop relationships with them. For Me, this is all about the long game.

Tuesday, September 22, 2015

30 Days of Kink - Day 22


What do you think is important in keeping a BDSM relationship healthy? How does it differ from a vanilla relationship?

Kinky relationships are still relationships. There is, literally, nothing different about keeping a kinky relationship healthy versus a vanilla relationship. Honesty, integrity, open communication, etc. are all vital elements of any healthy relationship, kinky or otherwise.

Monday, September 21, 2015

30 Days of Kink - Day 21


Favorite BDSM related book (fiction or non-fiction)

Hands down, it's Training With Miss Abernathy by Christina Abernathy. I found this book back when I was just a baby domme and it has proved invaluable. I can't say enough good things about it.

Sunday, September 20, 2015

30 Days of Kink - Day 20


Talk about something within kink/bdsm that you’re curious about/don’t understand.

After 10+ years, I understand kink/bdsm pretty well. There isn't much I don't understand. There will always be people who make no sense to Me, but that's as true of sports fanatics as it is of kinksters.

Likewise, there aren't many kinky activities I'm curious about; rather, I'm curious about people. 

Saturday, September 19, 2015

30 Days of Kink - Day 19


Any unexpected ways kink has improved your life? If so, what are they?

I can't think of any unexpected ways kink has improved My life. My life is awesome and would be awesome with or without kink. Because I'm just that fabulous.

Friday, September 18, 2015

30 Days of Kink - Day 18


Any kinky/BDSM pet peeves? If so, what are they?

One-trick ponies and do-me bottoms. I have zero interest in having a "foot slave" or instructing a guy to suck another guy's cock for My "pleasure". I don't give a fuck about fulfilling your fantasy; you're here to make My life easier and more pleasurable in whatever way I see fit. If you can please Me, then I will probably reward you, but it's not guaranteed. Learn your proper place or GTFO.

Thursday, September 17, 2015

30 Days of Kink - Day 17


What misconception about kinky people would you most like to clear up?

There are a couple of misconceptions that go hand-in-hand that need to die in a fire. The first is that kinky people are in any way more open-minded, tolerant, accepting, enlightened, or [insert adjective of choice] than anyone else. We're not.

Kinky people come from all walks of life. We can be religious or not, conservative or liberal, sweet-tempered or bitchy, or any combination of traits you can think of. The kink subculture is as rife with arrogant dipshits who couldn't find their asshole with both hands and a flashlight as the rest of the world. There are also just as many brilliant, creative, and generous people in the kink scene as there are anywhere else. Being kinky is not a badge of honor; it's just like any other hobby. Some people are hardcore fans, others are more casual about it, and others (the "vanillas") don't care about it at all.

Why is this important? Because it means kinky women are just like other women. Say it again for the people in the back.

Kinky women are just like other women.

Oh, you thought just because a woman was kinky it meant she was "easy" or that she would automatically be interested in your wank fantasies? Bwahahahaha! No. 

Here's the thing people, especially kinky men, need to understand: Your pathetic little dick is not special. You are not special. If you are not making time with vanilla women, being kinky is not going to improve your odds. If anything, it will lower your chances because men are statistically more likely to develop sexual fetishes than women. 

Of the women who are kinky, more of them are likely to be submissive than dominant because the patriarchal society we live in tells women their "natural place" is to be submissive. Which is complete bullshit, but most women can't or won't overcome their cultural programming. Not that I'm trying to diss submissive women in any way. I'm not. I completely support a woman's right to make her own choices and do whatever makes her happy and fulfilled, but the bottom line is that dominant women are in shorter supply than submissive ones.

Let that sink in for a minute. There are fewer kinky women than kinky men. There are even fewer dominant women. For every dominant woman, there are probably ten men who claim to be submissive vying for her attention. Dominant women like Me can afford to be picky because we know we're in short supply and our time is a hot commodity.

Now you start to understand why you have to bring your A-game to the table when you're trying to find the dominant woman of your fantasies. It's not about you, it's about her. You have to put her wants and needs before your own Every. Single. Time. If you are truly submissive, then you have to devote yourself to a life of service. Most of you don't have what it takes because you're just selfish, entitled assholes who want to bottom long enough to get your dick wet and then you're done. 

And now you also understand why women require tributes or charge for sessions. Because most guys don't even have an A-game. You've barely got a C-game. 

Wednesday, September 16, 2015

30 Days of Kink - Day 16


What are the most difficult aspects of having a sexuality that involves kink or BDSM for you personally?

Finding partners who can meet My exceptionally high standards is probably the most difficult thing. I need someone who is intelligent enough to keep up with Me and too many submissive men just don't have the brain power to hold up their end of an intelligent conversation that goes beyond talking about kinky sex or sports stats. The vast majority of men are boring as fuck.

Tuesday, September 15, 2015

30 Days of Kink - Day 15


Write about a BDSM/kink activity you’re curious about and would like to try.

I've tried almost everything I've ever wanted to try and then some, so I had trouble coming up with an answer to this question. I think the only thing I haven't done that interests Me is keeping a full-time slave. At some point, I'd like to have a 24/7, live-in slave, but that's not feasible at this point in My life.

Monday, September 14, 2015

30 Days of Kink - Day 14


How would you say real life BDSM/kink varies from fantasy BDSM/kink?

Real life kink looks a lot more vanilla than most people realize. Bills still have to get paid, the house/apartment still has to be cleaned, laundry has to be done, and kinky people are still humans who get sick or have bad days or are just too tired to play sometimes. Real life kink has nothing to do with a sub being locked naked in a cage 24/7 except when taken out to provide sexual service.

Porn videos, books like the 50 Shades trilogy, and other fantasy-based masturbatory materials are not realistic in any way, shape, or form but that's what a lot of submissive men expect. Some spend their lives trying to find someone to provide them with the carefully staged fantasies they've seen in porn, and they will always be disappointed. They will flounder from one partner to another, forever trying to recreate what they've seen or read about, but real life never measures up.

Those guys never seem to realize that what they want is what a professional dominatrix gets paid to provide and that real women have needs, desires, and goals that must be met before the kinky sex happens. Face it, guys, nothing in life is free and you're going to have to pay to ride this ride. Either you're going to pay in time, attention, and being a supportive partner who actually cares about a dominant woman's needs before your own or else you're going to pay in cold, hard cash. Figure out which form of payment you prefer and get comfortable with it.

Sunday, September 13, 2015

30 Days of Kink - Day 13


Explain as best you can what the appeal of kink/BDSM is to you? Why are you drawn to what you’re drawn to?

My primary kink is control. And I'm not talking about having control for a couple of hours or even a couple of days. The kind of control I crave is one of the reasons I enjoy kinks like financial domination. The more I can get into a sub's head and leave a lasting impression, the more it turns me on.

Saturday, September 12, 2015

30 Days of Kink - Day 12


Tell us about a humorous BDSM/kink experience you’ve had. If you haven’t had one, talk about aspects of kink/BDSM you find funny.

I can't think of a humorous experience off the top of My head, but if you can't laugh about it, you're doing it wrong.

Friday, September 11, 2015

30 Days of Kink - Day 11


What are your views on the ethics of kink?

Generally speaking, I float between RACK (Risk-Aware Consensual Kink) and PRICK (Personal Responsibility Informed Consensual Kink). It depends on how much experience the person I’m playing with has and how much trust we’ve established. In general, I expect My subs to be adults who are willing and able to take responsibility for themselves, including advocating to get their needs met.

Thursday, September 10, 2015

30 Days of Kink - Day 10


What are your hard limits?

Besides the obvious things like animals and kids, My hard limits include:
  • Toilet play/menstruation
  • ABDL/diapers/ageplay
  • Incest/pseudo-incest (including “step” relatives)
  • Needle play
  • Race play

Wednesday, September 9, 2015

30 Days of Kink - Day 9


Post a kink related song or music video you enjoy.

The kinky overtones may not be obvious to the untrained eye, but "Coin Operated Boy" by Dresden Dolls is about as awesome as it gets for those who are into objectification, dollification, transformation, etc. It certainly revs My motor.



Tuesday, September 8, 2015

30 Days of Kink - Day 8


Post a kinky image you find erotic.

I struggled with this one. I don't want to steal images but I couldn't find anything in the public domain that I really liked. That said, I make no claim to ownership of the following image. I found it on the Flickr of Webmastress. I have no idea if that person is the creator of this image or if they found it elsewhere. Google reverse image search does not give Me a definitive answer. The title is "Hard Times" and it appears to be Second Life photography or at least enhanced by Second Life images. In particular, I enjoy how the artist has played with depth of field for this piece.

Hard Times


Monday, September 7, 2015

30 Days of Kink - Day 7


What’s your favorite toy?

Hands down, it's My riding crop. It gives Me perfect control and I love the swishy, whistling sound it makes on the down-stroke.

Sunday, September 6, 2015

30 Days of Kink - Day 6


Describe your weirdest/most interesting sexual fantasy.

Ummm...no. There are things about that fantasy I can't disclose here. However, the one that takes second place involves creating My own personal Borg collective. I'll let you use your imagination to figure out where that's going.

Saturday, September 5, 2015

30 Days of Kink - Day 5


What was your first kinky sexual experience?

When I was 19, I had a three-way with My best friend at the time and her husband. He used scarves to blindfold her and tie her to the bed. Not very exciting, in retrospect, but for My teenage self who, up to that point, had lived a rather sheltered life in a very small town, it was pretty daring.

Friday, September 4, 2015

30 Days of Kink - Day 4


Any early experiences that, in retrospect, hint at your kinks?

I remember watching Saturday reruns of the old “Adventures of Batman and Robin” television show with Julie Newmar as Catwoman. In every episode, she managed to capture either Batman, Robin or, occasionally, both and keep them in some form of bondage. And even when they were struggling to escape, I always got the impression that she and Batman weren't nearly as adversarial toward each other as they pretended to be. It was more like an elaborate game of one-upmanship. I always wondered if Batman really wanted to escape or if he would have preferred to stay right where he was. I wanted to be Catwoman when I grew up and My style of dominance reflects that.

Thursday, September 3, 2015

30 Days of Kink - Day 3


How did you discover you were kinky?

Sometimes it seems like I was always kinky; the only question was which side of the whip I preferred. That was resolved about five minutes after I picked up My first riding crop.

Wednesday, September 2, 2015

30 Days of Kink - Day 2


List your kinks.

There are far too many to list all of them. In no particular order, I have a special fondness for:
  • Financial domination
  • Orgasm control/tease and denial
  • Feminization/sissy training
  • Transformation/modification (cosplay, rubber dolls, tight lacing, etc.)
  • IE/psychological enslavement
  • Psychological edgeplay/mindfucks
  • Cuckolding fantasies
  • Service-oriented submission
  • Shoe worship
  • Anal play (strap-ons/plugs)
  • CBT
  • JOI

Tuesday, September 1, 2015

30 Days of Kink - Day 1

I haven't been posting much, mostly because I've been enjoying My summer and haven't really cared about blogging. I've been a bit more active on My other social media accounts, especially Tumblr and Twitter because they're quicker and easier to update when I'm on the go. If you aren't following Me, you should be. Links are on My sidebar. Clicky clicky.

To get Myself back in the swing of blogging, I decided to do another "30 Days of X" meme. So, for the month of September, I bring you:



Dom, sub, switch? What parts of BDSM interest you? Give us an interesting in-depth definition of what that Means to you. Basically define your kinky self.

I am dominant; I am not Merely a top. I am the leader; I make the decisions and have the final say in all aspects of the relationship between Me and My subs. While I often delegate responsibilities and prefer for My subs to be able to offer an informed opinion on any given subject, I always have the last word on everything from what My subs eat to how they spend money.

I'm also a sadist. I like causing physical and mental anguish and more is usually better. That doesn't mean I want someone who is a pain slut, though. Too much of a good thing is bad. Part of My enjoyment of sadism comes from knowing pain is fun for you, up to a point...and after that, it's torture, but you'll take it because I want you to take it. A pain slut never reaches the point where pain stops being fun and starts being a test of endurance for My pleasure. That's not nearly as much fun for Me. I want you to suffer for My amusement.

Monday, August 10, 2015

That Moment When...

...a sub fills out My application perfectly and submits it with an appropriate tribute.



Think you have what it takes to become My slave? Take the first step by downloading My application:

Saturday, August 1, 2015

Emergency Bath Time

Someone found something stinky to roll around in so now Mama has to give us a bath. We do not understand why Mama doesn't appreciate our smells. This is our guilty face.


Monday, July 27, 2015

My Kooky Corys

My albinos decided to sit still long enough for me to snap a picture.
My little freshwater aquarium is home to six corydoras. Over the weekend, I did a 20% water change. Nothing too exciting about that, just routine maintenance. I have a rain barrel in my back yard to collect roof runoff, which the fish like, especially the occasional mosquito larva that makes for a nummy treat for a lucky cory.

But this time, I added some blackwater extract I found on Amazon. Corys are blackwater fish, and I want to simulate their natural environment as much as possible. Man, what a difference! These are usually pretty mellow fish. They have periods of activity, such as when the plant light clicks on in the morning and at feeding time, but mostly they just lounge around on the decorations or on the bottom substrate.

After I added the extract, the little guys went crazy, darting around all over the place. That was yesterday and they're still at it. I have never seen them be so active for so long. I'm definitely adding this stuff at every water change from now on. Best. Investment. Ever.

Tuesday, July 21, 2015

My Face...

...when a POT finsub answers My questions with two lines of vague bullshit.

Fairuza Balk as Nancy - The Craft

I make this face a lot.

Friday, June 19, 2015

Kiriel's Kitchen


Mixing up a batch of cookies. Because it's Friday, so why not? (I'll pay for this on the treadmill later, but idgaf.)

Wednesday, February 4, 2015

Digital Art

I recently started developing an interest in fractal art. I found a very cool, free program called Apophysis that allows Me to create my own pieces. Unfortunately, the most recent release of the most popular version, 7x, won't run on My laptop for some reason. (Oh, the joys of open-source.) However, there's an older version that lets Me do most of the same things, including create 3D images, which does work for Me.

Here are a couple of My first attempts. Not fabulous, but I'm learning.

Bubble

Petals

Monday, January 19, 2015

Thursday, January 1, 2015

Bitch, please...



Stupid wanker thinks he can get My attention with this? Bitch, please...My morning coffee costs more than this.